Monthly Archives January 2009

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It was sometime during junior year that I began to make other friends, other connections and bond with other people, especially girls. Amy and I had become good friends. (Yet another one lost to wind. I heard she was trying to track me down recently. Try harder, is all I can say. I’m not a [...]

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Amy was the second girl who ever told me she masturbated. Kate was the first. Of course that made Amy intriguing in my eyes. How could it not? I’m a boy. I like the idea of a girl being driven to that.
I stood in front of a mirror, masturbating to see what I looked like [...]

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You know what I find funny? No, you probably don’t. Well, maybe you do. At any rate, lets stop squabbling over details and I’ll tell you.
(Insert high-pitched, whiny girl voice: “We aren’t squabbling.” Yeah, whatever. Anyway.)
Capitalist society has discovered that, by utilizing the consumer model, they can (and have to) project you as [...]

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What does it take to keep a relationship alive?
I fell in love (well, Zach-love) with this waitress at a restaurant/bar right near the hotel. It was instantaneous, as my crushes tend to be. Hard and fast. I find myself eating there a lot. Fuck the Apple Jacks I brought with me; I want to see [...]

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“What a dreary day.”
“I don’t know . . . it’s kinda nice.”
“It’s overcast, dark and drizzling.”
“Yeah?”
“You’re incorrigible.”
“Do you even know what the word means?”
“Yes.”
“Well then, thank you.”
“I went out last night.”
“With what’s his name?”
“The same one I told you about last week.”
“The weed one?”
“What? Be nice, jackass.”
“Amy, I have such a hard time [...]

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I thought about backing out of the trip several times. But it didn’t seem fair to the others. To be completely honest, I had gone so far as to bring it up to Amy. She didn’t take it — she gave me a shitload of grief for it. Then she tried to tell me not [...]

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My eyes close. It is late; I am tired. I don’t want to think anymore. The day had been bad, the night even worse. It is three in the morning. I spent the day with Kate floating in my periphery the entire time. Amy thought it was funny. I didn’t and I don’t think Kate [...]

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It takes a lot to be able to look at someone and realize you hate him. Immediately. But that’s exactly what I could do with Shem. He was an idiot. Just look at his name. That’s reason enough. And I knew as soon as I met him he was going to fuck Stephanie over. Was [...]

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“That’s fucked up. Are you okay?” Everyone is in shock; Amy can only repeat herself.
“Yeah. I mean, I’m shaken up. I could see the bottle coming towards me. Glass and whiskey got all on my back. I’m sure I have glass all in my hair. I think I’m okay.”
“Lock the door,” I say. “If he [...]

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It’s that hollow feeling when nothing seems to be talking to you in the way that you want. Nothing seems real; you float through a nonsense land, a mirror world — a dimension beyond sight and sound. The moon has risen and I’m walking on the beach. Well, I’m not walking now. I can’t walk [...]